Interpersonal relationships have always been a challenge since the beginning of time. They can be complicated, constructive, or destructive. Until fairly recently, relationships in the workplace have generally been focused on the customer, with many companies having a Chief Relationship Officer or a Customer Relationships Officer.

One of the roles of such a person would be to build rapport and establish good relationships with customers to enhance customer retention. That all sounds great. But … what about giving some thought to the staff who have to engage with your customers and ensure your products and services are delivered?

If you don’t nurture good relationships from top to bottom and across your organisation, two things are going to happen – you’re going to end up with employees who are disengaged and unproductive and don’t do much to take the organisation forward, and you’re going to bleed talent on an ongoing basis and always struggle to attract and retain talent as word gets around that relationships within your organisation are not good.

So why have staff relationships never been given much attention in the past?

There are a few reasons for this, but the simple answer is that, for the past 70 years, companies have been run with a command and control leadership style. This style was a (long lasting) hangover from the Second World War, when, generally speaking, men around the world were engaged in military training and military action. After returning to civilian life and civilian jobs, they simply continued to run things like they were trained in the army. And it worked for many years—until now.

As younger generations who have not been militarised have entered the workplace, so pressure has increased to demilitarise leadership styles.

What’s this got to do with relationships?

For a start, command and control leadership is not dependent on interpersonal relationships. You’re issued with instructions, and you carry them out. That’s it. No questions were asked. The only time questions are asked is when you haven’t followed the instructions.

But, when you’re forced to ditch command and control leadership, what have you got to rely on?

Relationships!

You see, when you can’t issue instructions, you have to rely on something else—influence. And here’s the “beeg” secret: the level of influence you have in anyone’s life is determined by the quality of the relationship you have with them. No relationship, no influence.

Think about it … People with whom you have a good relationship enjoy a lot of influence in your life. You’ll pretty much do anything for them. And the same applies in the workplace. Leaders who enjoy good relationships with their team members will have people who will go not only the extra mile but a couple more as well.

Why, then, do companies attach so much importance to customer relationships while they neglect employee relationships? It just doesn’t make sense.

If you want to attract, engage, and retain the best talent available, start building unassailable relationships throughout your organisation. And don’t adopt a “quick fix” approach, treating this as a flavour of the month. Build long term relationships that are based on authenticity, kindness, empathy and compassion (some of the terms now creeping into the leadership lexicon).

So, while they are indeed important, don’t focus only on customer relationships. Also, start focusing on building sound relationships with your employees. You’ll be surprised at the impact this will have on the bottom line!

Need help with relationship building? Let’s talk!

Alan Hosking is the Publisher of HR Future magazine, www.hrfuture.net and @HRFuturemag. He is an internationally recognised authority on leadership competencies for the future and teaches experienced and younger business leaders how to lead with empathy, compassion, integrity, purpose, and agility. He has been an age management coach for two decades.

In 2018, he was named by US-based web site Disruptordaily.com as one of the “Top 25 Future of Work Influencers to Follow on Twitter“. In 2020, he was named one of the “Top 200 Global Power Thought Leaders to Watch in 2021” by PeopleHum in India. In 2022, he was named on the Power List of the “Top 200 Biggest Voices in Leadership in 2022” by LeaderHum.